i hate the phrase “life is short” because life is literally the longest thing that any of us will ever experience
unless you experience my penis
I just choked on my food.
that’s not the only thing you’ll choke on
Don’t they usually put choking hazard warnings on really small things?
FACT OF THE DAY: president obama does not have a plan in case the fire nation attacks
whenever i see a frog on a lily pad im like yeah man… thats exactly where youre supposed to be